How to Pray Together as a Couple
Many Christian couples say they want to pray together. Far fewer actually do it regularly. It can feel awkward, vulnerable, or intimidating, especially if one of you is more comfortable praying out loud than the other. But praying together can be one of the most powerful things you do for your marriage.
Why it matters
Matthew 18:19–20: "Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them."
When a husband and wife pray together, Jesus is right there with them. It invites God into the center of your marriage.
Ecclesiastes 4:12: "And a threefold cord is not quickly broken."
Praying together:
- Builds spiritual intimacy, and often emotional intimacy too.
- Softens hearts during conflict. It's hard to stay angry at someone you're praying with.
- Helps you know your spouse's worries, hopes, and dreams.
- Puts God at the center of your decisions.
Why it feels awkward
Many people feel exposed praying out loud in front of someone they love. Some worry about not praying "well." Others grew up never seeing their parents pray together. That's all normal. The awkwardness fades with practice.
7 simple ways to start
1. Start with one sentence each. Before bed, each of you prays one sentence. That's it.
2. Hold hands. Physical connection makes it feel more natural and intimate.
3. Ask, "How can I pray for you?" Then pray for each other specifically.
4. Pray silently together. If praying aloud is too hard at first, sit together and pray silently, then say "Amen" together.
5. Use a guide. Pray the Lord's Prayer together, or read a psalm aloud as a prayer.
6. Keep a shared prayer list. Write requests down and mark answers over time. You'll be amazed at God's faithfulness.
7. Pick a consistent time. Morning coffee, after dinner, or bedtime. Attach it to something you already do.
Keep it grace-filled
Never use prayer to correct, criticize, or preach at your spouse ("Lord, help him to finally…"). Keep prayers humble and kind. And if you miss days or weeks, just start again.
Make it part of your space
Create a simple spot for prayer: two Christian mugs for morning coffee and prayer, or faith-filled pillows on the couch where you sit together at night. Small cues build lasting habits.
A prayer for couples
Lord, thank You for our marriage. Be the third strand that holds us together. Teach us to pray together, even when it feels awkward. Help us know each other's hearts, carry each other's burdens, and seek You side by side. Be in the midst of us. Amen.
