Adoption and Foster Care: A Calling, Not a Consolation Prize
“You can always adopt.” For couples facing infertility, those words can sting, as if adoption were a backup plan. But for many families, adoption and foster care are a calling, a beautiful way God builds a family. They’re not a consolation prize, and the children are not anyone’s second choice.
Adoption is at the heart of the gospel
“Having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to himself” (Ephesians 1:5). Every believer is adopted into God’s family. Moses was raised by an adoptive mother. Esther was raised by her cousin. Jesus was raised by Joseph, who wasn’t His biological father.
But grief first
If you’ve walked through infertility, it’s wise to grieve that loss before or alongside pursuing adoption. Adoption doesn’t erase infertility grief, and a child deserves to be welcomed for who they are, not as a replacement.
Adoption also involves loss
Every adoption begins with a loss for the child and the birth family. Adoptive parents serve children well when they honor that story, make room for questions, and celebrate who the child is.
Ways to explore
- Domestic infant adoption, international adoption, or foster care, each with different needs and processes
- Foster care for children who need a safe home, short or long term
- Supporting adoptive and foster families with meals, childcare, prayer and respite, if adoption isn’t your calling
A prayer
“Lord, You set the solitary in families. Show us how You want to build ours, and give us hearts ready for the child You have in mind. Amen.”
See Hannah’s Prayer, and Blended & Co-Parenting for families formed in different ways.
